Why nowadays so many people get to know each other on the Internet? First of all, it is easier. You can stay at a convenient psychological distance from your partner and look for Wichita singles. Tell any untruth about yourself. Hide any truth. Ask whatever you want. Hide any feelings that you do not want to show. No one sees you and does not hear you. You can think 10 times before making a joke to be sure of your joke.
You can hide your fear, your embarrassment, your boredom at last – behind a “smiley face” and no one will guess. You seem to have gone out into the world, staying home. You seem to let your guests in, but only until the minute they are satisfied with you. With one click, there are no guests. The important thing is that there is no sense of guilt, but it would be unpleasant for everyone to leave the house with real guests. But there is a different morality and other obligations to your communication partner on the Internet.
The Internet gives communication (or its illusion), experiences (or their illusion), at the same time providing protection from natural fears that accompany real life. How do I look? Does he like me? Am I not being stupid? What kind of person is he? Am I not mistaken? Am I afraid to approach: suddenly it is not so? The Internet protects against all this, giving its advantages: you can afford what you can not do in reality. And the less confident a person is, the more afraid he is of intimacy, the lower his self-esteem, the more likely it is that it will drag him away. He will always delay the moment of his own “revelation”. So you can already start looking for Savannah singles now. This will help you find your other half.
Virtual dating and “virtual life” – is it bad or good?
When we are protected from real fears, we also lose real joys. This is not so much fun anymore. Contact, communication, emotions, life on the Internet – it’s mostly an illusion. While communicating on the Internet, we communicate with ourselves, get to know ourselves, have sex with ourselves. Communication on the Internet is one huge, total projection. In the context we are interested in, projection is a psychological term that refers to the unconscious attributing of own thoughts, feelings, aspirations and characteristics to a communication partner.
What happens during a real acquaintance? We communicate with a person, getting information from him or her for all our senses: we hear his or her voice, see the face, understand almost without distortion of what he or she says. We get some ideas about him. Sometimes it is also far from reality, but not as catastrophic as a virtual image. A virtual image is built according to other laws – it is a total projection of your feelings and thoughts on the image of a virtual partner. We can’t hear his voice, we can’t see his face, we can’t estimate his reactions. And all these information holes are closed with fantasies! A webcam is a funny similarity to a real picture, it will not save the situation either. So who do we end up talking to?
A virtual relationship is also, in some ways, an affair with yourself. This explains such a phenomenon as a sudden rupture of a virtual novel. People suddenly feel disgust with each other. But it has nothing to do with the partner – just comes intoxication from yourself: in fact, how much can you breathe the same air that you breathe out? Feedback from people who went “into the real world” after long virtual novels are similar – it’s a disastrous disappointment in the partner. Because the longer a virtual novel lasts, the more and more irreparably the image that you create becomes irreparable. The best thing you can do if you meet an interesting person online is to meet him immediately.